i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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