You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize