I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
