Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
