The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
