what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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