No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize
