Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
