Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
