Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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