At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
