ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
