Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
