But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
