Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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