Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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