Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
