Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
