Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Sorry about my life...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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