the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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