I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
