I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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