it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
