You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
