But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
