I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
