you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
