if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize
