If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
