she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
he fucked my hip out of place.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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