how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
The struggles of a small town man whore
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize