i just google imaged poop.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
