just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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