I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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