? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
