She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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