Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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