Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
