Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
