Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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