I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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