This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
