covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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