This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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