You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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