then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
