My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
