i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
