Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
