This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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